Out of the miry clay

Wow, haven’t been on tumblr in forever though. Cray.

Does anyone else just get absolutely sick of everyone?

Seriously, I feel the urge to just pick up my things and move to a new town and just meet brand new people. I’m so sick of all my old friends, because they’re either fake, boring, or inconsistent. I have plenty of acquaintance, but never felt a connection with any of them. There’s like no one at my school that I don’t already know that would be fun to hang out with. I consider myself a spontaneous person, and I feel like none of my friends are open to that. And even if they are, I don’t have the resources to go on adventures (a car, money). Not all my friends are intellectuals. So I can’t have deep conversations with them. And the ones that are smart tend to be really condescending, which I can’t stand.

I just need to meet someone, romantic or platonic, whose willing to try new things with me, drive around to new places, do crazy spontaneous things while just having good clean fun. I feel so alone. I attribute some of this to just my personality type (ENFJ). I need to consistently be around people, no matter what. I can’t be by myself for too long. Too much energy, good or bad, accumulates too fast. If I was an introverted person, I could easily do all the things I want to do on my own and enjoy it just as much. But I’m not. I NEED someone to do it with, to keep me company. But lately, there hasn’t been anyone I’ve been around that I feel a real connection with. Even with the vast amount of people I know, I still feel so…lonely.

And I’m not trying to sound picky or petty, I’m just really frustrated with the people in my life. I’m hoping this is just apart of growing up, like, growing pains. Maybe once I graduate and move out of the house and start branching out I’ll start to broaden my group of who I know, and hopefully meet someone who matches me better.

But for now, I don’t know what to do with myself…